I wanna remember that loving feeling, when we were young and our hopes were high. Our hearts were something we could believe in; Love was more than just a word before we ever heard goodbye. -Deana Carter

Late night takes a hold of my emotions, and as I look in the mirror trying to see what other people might see in me, I can't see past my own reflection. My complection isn't clear, I'm breaking out like crazy these days- probably from the stress of the past few months that I've been creating for myself. My green eyes seem a little warn down, and my hair is frizzled from the day now past.

It's at times like this, when even though I have been on a high all day, my mood starts to sink. What's the point of smiling, caring, or just doing anything? People love me... day by day they love me for who I am, or who they see me as, and I love them back. But that doesn't explain anything.

I'm never hte one looking for answers. If he doesn't like me, so what. If I fail a class, I'd rather not know. If it doesn't turn out the way I wanted it to, that's life. But when it gets to this turning point at night, it all changes. Suddenly I find myself sitting here wondering all the questions I forbid myself to care about during any other point in time.

Smile, babe. You need to make it through this night and tomorrow, because even when you don't see it you make a difference and people need you. You don't have to believe it for it to be true, but you've felt it yourself... even a smile can change a person's world, and flip it upside down.
Don't give up, honey. You've got hopes and dreams to strive for. Never give up, because there are dreamers in this world such as yourself who have seen better days, and you will too with time. Even if it's not in this life.
Move on, sweet girl. You can't let the world pass you by any longer. Step in, stop wanting to cry for yourself, and live instead of watching other people live. You have faith in yourself if you only knew where to look for it.

Egads, I'm giving myself advice. It's because I want to stop smiling, and let myself fall into the sadness I'm starting to feel surging within me... but I know better than that.

There's got to be a reason. I don't have to see it to know that much.