The numbness is finally settling in. I've stopped crying quite so much, although little birsts of tears still keep randomly occuring. All day he's still been in my head. I wish I could go to the funeral, I wish Laur could go with me.

I spent the afternoon hanging out with my aunt and cousin... it was really nice. I think they both knew, but we didn't talk about it. It gave me a chance to get my mind off of things for a little while- which really scares me. I'm not looking forward to so much time in the car in the next few days.

I wrote a bit in a journal I carry with me, which I might post later.